Well I did go to the college some weeks about about signing up for classes but the second I walked into the guidance office there was a skinny blonde girl in the room with her back to me and I instantly start having a panic attack. I had to struggle talking to the guidance person, but once I saw it wasn't ' her". It makes me wonder if I could handle going to that place where I know she is so I haven't signed up for classes, I don't know if I will. My mother hates this idea but I just don't know if its possible for me to act like I should out in public, and I know I have more panic attacks and anger attacks now being on the medications than without. Currently I just stopped taking my anti depressants because where I get them for free they stopped giving me a months supply at a time and they switched to only giving two weeks worth..I don't have another doctors appointment till next year. Sometimes when I actually feel like talking to a therapist I don't get the chance. 

While typing this my Hands have started involentary jerks, I don't know what medication is causing this.right now I am at the fattiest I've ever been I don't like it, I need to start working out again with all this free time I have, but I just never feel like it and my leg hurts, and I went to the doctor no blood clots or anything, the referred me to another doctor for X-ray and stuff but I can't afford that so I just will live with the pain. The ultra sound was free going through a cheap place called helping hands.

I haven't really been looking for jobs I don't want to do customer service with my anger issues. But I suck at factory work I've done that before. Thought about trying for my old curior job but it was so lonely driving all night alone.